Playing with my son and his toys (real) is better than the elaborate family outing to a kid-friendly destination (ideal)–because that elaborate family outing isn’t going to happen (anytime soon).

Eating popcorn and watching ‘Modern Family’ reruns with my wife every Tuesday night (real) is better than an expensive evening out at a Broadway show and trendy restaurant (ideal)–because that expensive evening only comes once or twice a year.

Pizza and plenty of laughs with old friends (real) is better than the five-course gourmet dinner party I’d like to throw for people I want to impress (ideal)–because that dinner party is unlikely to happen.

Going for a long walk each day (real) is better than training for an Iron Man Triathlon (ideal)–because, well…you know.

Reading a couple of chapters from the Gospels alone in the car before work (real) is better than the in-depth scholarly...

I’m not going to get much done today.

That is, if you mean emails and phone calls and project work. The kinds of to-do lists professionals make for each day.

My three-year old has a very bad head cold and a cough so bad he threw up his Frosted Mini Wheats. I’m home with him today. He’ll play with his toys and watch TV. He may even take a nap. When he does, I’ll squeeze in “work” where I can.

I’m not going to get much done today.

And yet…what I do today will go down as one of the great accomplishments of my life.

In 20 or 30 years, neither my son nor I will remember emails and phone calls. We won’t remember the “work” that didn’t get done today.

But we will remember the day we got to hang out at home together. I’ll treasure the memory of my son when he was just three. If he can even remember this day, he’ll recall when his daddy stayed home from “work” to rub his back and wipe...

It means you’re worthy of testing.

Or you’re ready for growth like you never imagined possible.

Even if you don’t believe God has anything to do with it (maybe he doesn’t), you can still choose what you believe about a losing streak.

Believe that it is an opportunity to be the best you can be in the face of the worst that can come at you. You cannot control circumstances or people. Sometimes you cannot control your own body and its impulses.

But when the hits keep coming–from within or without–do this: Breathe. Give thanks. Stand as straight as you can. And hit back with all the love you’ve got.

This is your time for glory.

There is only one.

Everyone goes to hell.

The people who go to heaven are the ones with the faith to keep going as many times as they go through hell.

As you go through life, no single person will disappoint, disgust, frustrate, and shock you more than…you.

In fact, the feelings of disappointment, disgust, frustration, and horror are ten times worse because you should be able to control yourself, right?

How could you be so [sinful/stupid/weak] that you can’t do the right thing or not do the wrong thing? Again and again and again?

Surely, nobody else (except for the people in mugshots on the 6 o'clock news) is as [sinful/stupid/weak] as you are.

You must be the only one who screws up this much in this way.

If people only knew the truth about you. Someday they will. Someday it will be your mugshot on the 6 o'clock news.

You’re going to blow it. Lose everything. And you can’t do a thing to stop it because you’re so specially [sinful/stupid/weak].

So eat that pint of ice cream, fatso. Light up another cigarette (you know you...

Hypothesis: Faith is found in tension.

The tension between:

Discipline and mercy.

A familiar and personal Parent and a holy and mysterious God.

Giddy generosity and saving for a rainy day.

Making art and making a living.

Asking God boldly and saying: “Thy will be done.”

Walking on water and climbing into the life boat God sends you.

Believing in eternal life and living every day as if it is the last.

Not in the sense of “The One Who Got Away.”

More like your own personal “Golden Age.”

Anthropology and scientific research proves that we all do it: Long for a golden yesteryear when everything was better, everything was right.

Being part of my son growing up (he’s three years old now) is causing frequent flashbacks to my own boyhood.

For just an instant, I’m back there again. Trying out my new swing set in the big, sunny yard behind the yellow house on Revere Road in Akron, Ohio. My parents are there: Flush with the confidence and energy of newlyweds starting out in life.

The memory feels like warm gold.

And then it cuts like a knife. Those people and that place are gone forever, fading like the signal from a satellite moving beyond the solar system.

Grief–it has to be grief–is the aftertaste of the sweetest memory.

You have memories like this. Sometimes you visit them. As...

And it is your fear.

You want to know your calling in general or particular?

Do you want to know who you are supposed to be?

Where is the fear most intense?

That’s where you must go to meet God and realize all your potential in life.

I suffered my first panic attack in December 1994. Extreme anxiety and panic are as much a part of life for me as allergies and weight control.

As much as anxiety and panic are miserable companions, they are excellent teachers if you are willing to listen and observe.

Fear is useful for keeping us safe from real danger: Cigarettes, reckless driving, unprotected sex with strangers, etc.

But our brain does not know the difference between perceived danger and real danger. It releases the same fight-or-flight chemicals whether it’s an attractive female or an F5 tornado approaching.

And this is where fear shows us the way we must go and teaches us who...

Confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation have nothing to do with morals.

God is not interested in morals. He’s interested in you.

The people who love you don’t love you for your morals. They love you for you.

When our conscience makes us feel guilty, it is we who separate ourselves (emotionally, mentally, physically) from the love of God and the people who love us. That love does not change or go away when we sin.

In fact, if we have the courage to give it a chance, love actually moves toward us when we’re at our worst.

Confession is that courage to let love in.

Morals just get in the way.

Thousands (or more) people are fasting and praying for Sierra Shields.

She is a 30-year old Christian ministry graduate student and a resident of New York City. She disappeared without a trace on January 14.

The church to which I belong cares deeply for Sierra. Her brother is our minister of worship. Many members of our congregation are Sierra’s personal friends or one-time schoolmates at Rochester College.

You could say that praying for Sierra’s safe return is at the top of the “trending” list at church. It was the unofficial theme of our Sunday morning worship gathering this week.

This got me thinking.

The 20 days since Sierra disappeared feel desperate, empty, terrible.

Perhaps because her absence is not something we chose and her return appears to be out of our control.

But what about the people whose absence we could change and whose return is completely within our...