Being right or being together?

In marriage, it is impossible to win a fight.

If you are fighting, both of you already lost at the start.

In marriage, you will have many disagreements.

You will cajole and compromise, debate and discuss, negotiate and re-negotiate. Great partners do these things well.

Put another way, great partners know how to dance together.

Dancing together is creative tension in a safe embrace.

Dancing together is being different while also being the same.

Dancing together is beautiful to behold and lovely to experience.

What does it take to dance this way?

You want to be together more than you want to be right.

It’s a dance; not a heavyweight prize fight.

If it is a great marriage you want, then learn to dance you must.

And so it goes with a great family, a great friendship, a great house of worship, a great workplace.

Or a great democracy.

All fighters lose.

All dancers win.

Which will you be?

 
0
Kudos
 
0
Kudos

Now read this

Ode to Tracy on her birthday (or the “heathen temptress” who turned out to be my angel of light)

I tried so hard to talk myself out of liking or loving Tracy. The biggest reason I tried so hard to not like her is that I didn’t imagine she would like me back. I wanted to save myself the heartbreak, so I tried to coax my heart away... Continue →